President Of Nigeria: I’m Not A Clone, Stop Asking

Every leader worth their salt has had a crazy conspiracy theory formulated about them. Angela Merkel is Hitler's daughter, Vladimir Putin hangs out with aliens, Xi Jinping is the reincarnation of Winnie the Pooh -- the list is endless. But the most widespread (and successful by 2016 election standards) of our time was definitely the birther movement, whereby a bunch of sun-deficient blowhards claimed the black man in the White House wasn't a genuine U.S. citizen. Now it seems that some of Nigeria's political parties are borrowing Trump's Big Book of Birther BS to claim their president is also not who he says he is. Not that they're saying he was born in another country. Just that his clone was.

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During a UN climate conference in Poland, Nigerian president and (because Nigeria has seen more coups than a divorced dads support group parking lot) former military dictator Muhammadu Buhari addressed a pressing issue in Nigerian politics: That he is not, in fact, a clone. "It's the real me," the president boldly proclaimed. Buhari felt the need to defend his realness after conspiracy theorists set the Nigerian internet on fire claiming Buhari had been switcherooed during time abroad.

Recently, the 75-year-old has been suffering from an undisclosed medical problem, and he had disappeared for five months to the UK for medical treatment. (Sounds less like he got cloned and more like he just got a facelift and a quick nip/tuck.) But now Nigerians on the street are saying, "Let him remove his cap and prove he's Buhari," because everyone knows that clones all have a big "2" tattooed on their foreheads.

But cloning isn't the biggest concern. That would be the much more wild claim that the (current) Buhari is a surgically enhanced doppelganger from Sudan named "Jubril." This stand-in madness is even supported by some of his political opponents, which nicely plays into their hand of attacking the president's bad health during the upcoming elections. In fact, leading the attack of the cloners are the Indigenous People of Biafra, a secessionist political party whose leader, Nnamdi Kanu, has even posted a flipped picture of the president on Twitter which claims the "impostor" writes with the wrong hand.

A video has also been posted showing how Jubril was made to look exactly like Buhari -- which is literally just a clip taken from the 1997 movie Face/Off. We can't wait for when Nigerian conspiracy nuts update their movie references to the 2000s so they can start claiming Buhari has been replaced by a blue-skinned mutant shapeshifter.

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