Although we have our suspicions about some, most celebrities are probably just people. They make mistakes, they have their little quirks, they practice strange hobbies -- sometimes ones that are totally at odds with their popular personae. We're talking about how ...
Before he started his career as a football player in the '90s, Terry Crews worked as an artist. More specifically, a courtroom sketch artist (for the "worst murder" in Flint, Michigan, no less). He didn't stop when he got involved in sports, either. As a way of supplementing his income, Crews painted portraits of his teammates.
As he puts it:
"I would get cut from a team -- I played on six teams in seven years, so that happened a lot -- so I would go back into the locker room and ask the players if they wanted their portraits painted. That's how I survived. Humility gets you far. You gotta make some money, you gotta humble yourself ... I would literally take me about two months to do a painting, and they would give me like $5,000 and I would survive off that, my whole family survived off that."
In fact, Crews recently released A Very Terry Christmas, in which he channels his inner Bob Ross. We'd tell you more, but we'd like you to at least finish reading this sentence before running out to watch it.
If you don't know Chrissy Teigen as a supermodel, maybe you know her as an author. Hell, there's a non-zero chance you know her from the garbage hellscape that is celebrity Twitter. Like that time last year when she revealed that she not only played Neopets, but moderated comments and entered (and won!) a bunch of caption competitions.
On the plus side, she got out before the Scientologists arrived. You ever wonder what it'd look like if Tom Cruise preached the good (well, the OK) word through point-and-click flash games instead of his movies? That's what almost happened here.
Mark Hamill is a huge fan of Late Night With David Letterman, but that description undersells things a bit. From 1982 to 2003, Hamill not only kept a running journal documenting skits like "Viewer Mail," but also recorded every single broadcast. For over 20 years. That's thousands upon thousands of episodes, all recorded (even while he was traveling) and documented, just so he could cut his own "best-of" tapes.
Hamill was so dedicated that when Late Night wanted to celebrate its thousandth "Viewer Mail" segment, they contacted Hamill and asked to poke around his tapes and journals for the show. Eventually, Hamill realized the Sisyphean task that lay before him and quit cold turkey in 2003. He vowed not only to never watch Late Night again, but to banish all late-night talk shows from his viewing schedule.
As for the tapes, they're currently sitting in Hamill's basement, where they will one day serve as humanity's only form of entertainment after the apocalypse.
Donald Trump is not an intellectual. You knew that. You just didn't know how far he takes it.
In a 1997 profile in The New Yorker, Trump revealed that one of his favorite movies was the JCVD classic Bloodsport ... the CliffsNotes version:
"We hadn't been airborne long when Trump decided to watch a movie. He'd brought along 'Michael,' a recent release, but twenty minutes after popping it into the VCR he got bored and switched to an old favorite, a Jean Claude Van Damme slugfest called 'Bloodsport,' which he pronounced 'an incredible, fantastic movie.' By assigning to his son the task of fast-forwarding through all the plot exposition-Trump's goal being 'to get this two-hour movie down to forty-five minutes'."
The plot points of a JCVD movie are not expendable. They were never going to win awards, sure, but the average human brain can only watch so many dudes get smacked in the junk before it craves dialogue -- even if that dialogue is just "Jesus Christ, will you please stop smacking me in the junk?!"
If anything, Freddie Mercury was a cat person first, and the singing was something that he did to support the habit. He had ten cats in total, a menagerie that started in the 1970s with "Tom" and "Jerry." While he was touring, he would call home and ask to speak to them. As his personal assistant described in his memoir, "He'd get to a hotel, we'd dial through, and ... Mary [Austin] would hold Tom and Jerry up to the receiver to listen to Freddie talking."
Over time, his cat family grew ... as did the amount of attention he heaped upon them. He bought them gifts, dedicated his solo album to them. ("To my cat Jerry -- also Tom, Oscar, and Tiffany, and all the cat lovers across the universe -- screw everybody else!") He made sure that their photos were featured in Queen newsletters. And he would absolutely go into meltdown if anything happened to them.
When "Goliath" disappeared for several hours, Freddie tore his house apart. Quite literally -- he threw a grill through a window. When Goliath was found several hours later:
"Freddie was over the moon ... For five minutes or more he pored [sic] his attention on the kitten, cuddling and stroking him. Then, like a mother, Freddie scolded the cat, shouting and screaming at tiny Goliath for leaving Garden Lodge. The dark ball of fur just sat there, listening calmly to Freddie's outburst and purring loudly."
He also owned a vest adorned with portraits of his cats, which you can check out in the music video for "These Are The Days Of Our Lives."
Out of all his cats, Freddie had a favorite: Delilah. He immortalized her in song, he spent hours painting her with watercolors, and one of the last things he did before dying was stroke her fur. And of course, he ensured that everything he left behind went to his beloved feline friends. Maybe some to one or two people ... but only because cats are notoriously bad at handling paperwork.
Adam Wears is on Twitter and Facebook, and has a newsletter dedicated to depressing history facts. It's not as heartbreakingly sad as it sounds, promise!
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