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If you'd like to retain some semblance of your sanity, here's a guided tour of the worst press release ever.
Remember Jackie Jormp-Jomp from '30 Rock'? Yeah, that's our reality now.
Surprise! The media isn't very good.
Things get easier when you make it big ... but the disasters get bigger, too.
Turns out rap battles aren’t the only musical feuds out there.
Some people are born Meat Loaf, and others have Meat Loaf thrust upon them.
Let's just let this poor woman rest.
Pure, simple, unfiltered mockery.
God bless you, Spice, for this service to thirsty nerds everywhere.
Most songs are about boning.
Ace, the new Gorillaz band member, might just destroy our reality.
Some one-hit wonders refuse to go quietly into the night.
Pro tip: you don't want to be the venue worker who doesn't recognize My Chemical Romance.
Having your novelty song go big is bittersweet, which is why it's no wonder that most bands follow them up a with some weird, embarrassing, desperate stuff.
How awesome is John Williams? So awesome that he used musical notation to tell us that Anakin and Padme boning will eventually lead to galactic genocide.