Quentin Tarantino may be Hollywood's truest filmmaker. He can effortlessly master any genre, from the overlong and bloody war movie to the overlong and bloody western to even the overlong and bloody period piece. So with his recent claims that he's only got one movie left in him, it must be some consolation to fans that the auteur has hinted that he again wants to do something completely different, a genre he has never tried before: horror. Wait, why does that sound so familiar?
Rumors about Tarantino's tenth and final film have been flying around for ages, with the biggest contenders being his "first-ever" sequel, Kill Bill 3 (Kill Bill 2 doesn't count) or an R-rated Star Trek (a concept that was already dated when Sir Patrick Stewart still had hair). But according to The Independent, QT has been bitten by the horror bug after doing the creepy Manson stuff in Once Upon A Time ... In Hollywood, which he said during a panel was the "closest to a horror sequence" he ever directed. Which is weird, because you'd think that'd be the time when he directed Kurt Russell to horrifically mangle young women in Death Proof.
If you can't remember the 2007 slasher pastiche, well, apparently neither can its director. That's not surprising, though, as it's objectively Tarantino's worst film. Both critics and audiences rated it "meh" when it was released, and despite the exploitation genre being built for cult successes, didn't leave a lasting impression -- not even on QT himself, it seems. When his Once Upon A Time editor said that they just made "The Texas Chain Saw Massacre with a budget," that still didn't trigger his memory about the time he spent $30 million making a '70s-style movie about a deranged psychopath murdering young women with machinery which he shot and set in Austin.
So is it really time for this forgetful old coot to retire, or is he willfully pretending as if his worst film never happened? Of course, the real question is: Does that mean if we all go along with it, he'll eventually have to admit he's on Movie #8 and we'll possibly get both a good QT horror and Kill Bill 3?
Let us rephrase that: Hey, have you guys heard Tarantino might be making his first-ever horror movie?
For more weird tangents and his personal recipes for toilet wine, do follow Cedric on Twitter.
Also, we'd love to know more about you and your interesting lives, dear readers. If you spend your days doing cool stuff, drop us a line at iDoCoolStuff at Cracked dot com, and maybe we can share your story with the entire internet.
Follow us on Facebook ... if you dare.