It's not exactly a secret that some popular personalities who stream video games on Twitch have amassed a huge subscriber count on with talents other than their gaming skills. It's the sort of thing that's been a part of the economy since the first creature to emerge from the primordial soup developed flirty eyelashes, but nobody told Erik Estavillo, who has sued Twitch over his sore dick. No, really.
Estavillo's primary complaint is that Twitch has no option for filtering streamers by gender, meaning he's just inundated with boobs against which he's completely helpless. Which is why he follows 786 female streamers and zero male ones. The boob energy leaps boobily out of the screen and possesses his penis, which forces him against his will to click on the boobs and then yank his haunted dick to the point of physical injury and incendiary destruction of property. It's kind of an Idle Hands situation.
To compensate for his numerous burning sensations, Estavillo is asking for $25 million in damages and a permanent ban for several streamers that he's identified as too hot to safely exist, but that's just the tip of this story. It turns out Estavillo is a serial gaming suer, having once filed a complaint against Blizzard for forcing World of Warcraft players to level up before they could acquire certain items (otherwise known as being a video game) that invoked everyone from Winona Ryder to Depeche Mode. That's just the most interesting of his many suits against pretty much every major gaming platform, and he's up to his old tricks here as well. Although his main beef is with his hog, Estavillo also claimed in the lawsuit that the middling variety and quality of the games offered by Twitch's Free Games With Prime service constitutes false advertising, because you can apparently just sue people for bad games. If you'll excuse us, we have several complaints to lodge against the makers of Fallout '76.
Whatever's going on there, it seems Estavillo is intent on riding these lawsuits to the worst kind of fame. His YouTube channel describes him as "[f]amous for my video gaming lawsuits!" and either he or someone with his name appears to have run for the House of Representatives extremely briefly. And you know what? Fine. We don't even care about adding to the pile of publicity he's apparently chasing, because whatever kind of fame he gets for being the necrotic dick guy, he's earned it.
Follow Manna on Twitter for more jokes about poorly received and mostly forgotten '90s movies.