Taco Bell Now Sells 'Jalapeño Noir' Wine Because Reality Is Melting

Ah yes, Taco Bell, everyone's favorite restaurant at 3 a.m. Home to questionable late-night delicacies, including quesaritos, crunchwrap supremes, and, uh, gourmet vinos? Yes, you read that correctly. Taco Bell Canada now sells wine, meaning you can now get drunk at the restaurant once reserved for when you're already shwasted. 

Jalapeño Noir (because why wouldn't it have a cheesy name?) is a custom wine designed as a pairing for the restaurant's new Toasted Cheesy Chalupa, which just hit menus in Canada. According to the franchise, the dynamic duo is "irresistible," as the "Toasted Cheesy Chalupa complements notes of wild strawberry, cherry and beetroot in this silky limited-edition red wine." As some of you readers may know, I am very far from a food and wine connoisseur -- as I write this, my stomach is still hurting from today's cheese fudge experiment -- but considering cheese and fruit tend to vibe well together, this seems to check out. 

The wine, which comes from a local vineyard in Ontario, is being dubbed a "collector's item" with three unique bottle labels -- because nothing says impressing your in-laws like bringing them a vintage Taco Bell noir. Although Jalapeño Noir will sadly not be sold in the U.S. once the Toasted Cheesy Chalupa drops this November, and the initial supply of the drink sold out in just two minutes in Canada, according to Taco Bell website, all hope is not lost. A restock has been confirmed for some unknown point in the future. And if you still don't get it? I guess it's nacho wine, after all.

Top Image: Taco Bell